My guys always feel conflicted about party invitations. They love the idea of the party, and usually have fun, but the anticipation, and concern about what might occur at an event leaves them a little bit anxious. Will there be a clown? Loud music? Food they don't care for? Most times, they accept the invitation, and we have a great time. sometimes we may have to leave early, and almost always, we have to go home and decompress afterward.
The one that stands out for me the most clearly was an invitation to a birthday party of a classmate. Boy one brought the invitation home, we looked at it, and immediately, both of my sons refused to go.
This made me very concerned! Was this child bullying them at school? Was there something I should know about? I tried to get the information out casually. I asked if they still got along with the boy. They assured me they did and that he was a great kid! I asked if they had been told not to come by some of the more unkind children in the class. Again, they said no. I took a different approach and asked them if there was something special on television that evening, a place were were supposed to go, or an event I had forgotten about. No, no, and no.
Now I was really stumped, and since all of the more delicate topics had been cleared I was free to just come right out and ask, so I did. I asked them why in the world they were so adamant about not attending.
Boy Two picked up the invitation and brought it to me. "Mom, just look.."
I looked and looked and completely missed the obvious. I looked again. Finally the lighbulb went on. The boy lived on a street named Dogwood Lane. After a nasty run in with an untrained German Shepherd, they wouldn't go anywhere near a dog for over a year.
I got up to excuse myself and had a little laugh. I tried to imagine what a first grade Aspie mind conjured up when it thought of a street with that name.
Then I returned and showed them some information about dogwood trees. We called the boys mother and she assured me they had no dogs, and no dogs would be present at the party, and the boys brightened, and made plans to go.
art by Gary Larson |